YOU LIKE VEGEMITE?!,!?!?!?!?!

REBEL.

HOW LONG HAVE WE KNOWN EACH OTHER

HOW VERY DARE YOU CAST ASPERSIONS UPON MY STRAYAN-NESS

JUST FOR THAT, MY MOST WONDROUS OF REBELS, I HAVE FUCKING PHOTOBLOGGED THE MAKING AND EATING OF VEGEMITE TOAST

FIRST. GET YOUR TOAST.

this is the multigrain variation of this fine dish, purchased from my local bakery (who DO A FAB CHEESYMITE SCROLL TYVFM AND NO THEY’RE NOT BAKERS DELIGHT EITHER)

then get your essentials:

THE STUFF.

Toast is done. Get butter happening.

LOTS OF BUTTER.

Then get into that salty umami happiness pot:

fuck, I’m almost out. Time to sacrifice a wombat, I guess

(just joking of course, ahahahaha*)

NEXT. SPREAD THAT VEGEMITE ONTO THE TOAST. NOT THICKLY. This is not fucking nutella, your tongue will be scorched land and you will taste nothing but salt for decades if you spread it on like nutella. THINLY. You wanna see butter in places.

(hopefully your bread isn’t as fresh and liable to fucking tear as mine…)

Now. Eat that wonderful goddamned black gold, savoury and buttery and warm and fucking delicious, all the while secure in the knowledge that there is now a rose in your every cheek (yes, we know, we know, the mental image is hilarious).

It is at this point that you will be forced to fight any opportunistic bastard walking into the kitchen who says, “oh, is that vegemite on toast?” They want your second slice. DO NOT GIVE IN. They make their own, dammit. This one’s yours.