Vetinari: You have two cows. You convince them they will better off with you alive and in control than not.
Sam Vimes: You have two cows. They are probably guilty of something. Loitering, probably.
Young Sam: Where are your cows? Those goes “baah.” Those are sheep. They are not your cows.
Moist von Lipwig: You steal two cows. You convince everyone they are made of gold and sell them for a fortune. You get arrested and become Minister of Agriculture.
Tiffany Aching: You have two cows. An elf tries to steal them and you hit it with a frying pan.
Nac Mac Feegle: Someone has two cows. You steal them, then fight them, then fight yourself. You win.
Rincewind: You run away from cows.
Unseen University: You have two cows. One is caught up in a magical accident and is now a chair. The other has become a professor.
Sybil Ramkin: You have many cows. They aren’t dragons, so you don’t care. You have 37 dragons.
Nanny Ogg: You have a cow and a bull. You enjoy explaining how they will make more cows.
Granny Weatherwax: You wish Gytha would stop explaining how you get cows.
King Verence: You try to create an economic plan for your country based on bovine products; your people are too busy listening to Nanny Ogg.
I’ve been getting notifications on this all morning, and it’s weirdly appropriate – Tet, the black cat, died on Thursday. I’m pretty sad, but it makes me smile to see this again, to remember all the good times we had together. ❤
sorry Nonnie, I know this is a cute headcanon and all – but my personal feelings are that the Sansukh kids and Thranduil just don’t… quite click, for some reason. He wouldn’t be able to unbend or relax enough to be natural with them, and kids are astonishingly amazing at sensing that sort of thing. He’s also new, and if you know toddlers, then you know it generally takes a gooooood long while for them to warm up to strange new folks. Frankly, I 100% doubt Frerin would ever kiss him.
But that’s okay! Laerophen will pick up the slack, ofc, and he’ll be well-meaning and awkward and real, and they will run riot and fight and get into trouble and get their way and basically walk all over him and he will enjoy every second of it.
(yanno the Sansukh character who is THE championest champion of pebble-wrangling, the winner of the “good with kids forever” title? Baris 😉
thranduil sleeps calmer knowing even if his son married a dwarf at least he married The Supermodel dwarf and singlehandedly crushed the hopes of single dwarves and dwarrowdams everywhere
DETS YOU GOTTA SEE THIS
okay so i’ve already reblogged this, i know, but preserved-in-salt Thranduil and scorchingly-jawdroppingly-hot Gimli is everything i love forever
You ever have those times where probably the only thing that keeps the vise-grip of a panic attack at bay would probably involve someone using anesthesia on you? (And lucky me, the primary anesthesia didn’t work.)
Yeah. That’s…been the last…uhm…huh. That’s been the last year and change. It just got worse lately by a factor of I Don’t Know But It Sucks.
Cut for details because this runs long, but I’m trying to provide a full picture and not fail at it, or whine any more than I am right now. (Nope, already failed at not whining. Dammit.)
This is basically me getting down on my knees and begging for survival, except my knees already hurt so let’s just pretend I did that part, okay?
Aw Yiss 