Tag: bilbo baggins

linddzz:

linguisticparadox:

“‘Hmmm! it smells like elves!’ thought Bilbo.”

Wait. What.

Bilbo I am like 90% sure you have never met elves before???

Also…what exactly does an elf…smell like….

this raises so many questions

-does bilbo sniff around for elves like some weird hobbity bloodhound?

-do hobbits have extra sensitive senses of smell and do they use this to find mushrooms and truffles? (answer is obviously yes)

-nevermind what do elves smell like how does bilbo KNOW what elves smell like

-good thing he didn’t say this out loud. i can just imagine the looks the company would have given him if Bilbo sniffed the air and declared “it smells like elves!” in that cheerful hobbit way of his

-hobbits are creepy


https://determamfidd.tumblr.com/post/141948997788/audio_player_iframe/determamfidd/tumblr_o4uk8xxrnb1rb0mtv?audio_file=https%3A%2F%2Fa.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_o4uk8xxrnb1rb0mtvo1.mp3

I DID IT YESSSSSSSS

For the ongoing hobbit4ham shenanigans! This is a recorded version of ‘Wait For It’ as sung by Bilbo, with added accompaniment and chorus bc reasons.

(HEY @culturalrebel I WENT NUTS AGAIN)

(originally posted here, lyrics reproduced under the cut heeeeey)

[BILBO]
Writing out the story in the Red Book every day
I’m keeping the lamp lit while your light is away
He’s on the other side of twilight,
He tried to take back what was his,
But now the nights are growing darker,
and it is what it is.

Love doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep loving anyway
We laugh and we cry
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason beyond my pride
That I stayed by his side
Then I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

My grandfather was a Thain and a great tactician
But there are things of which the Shire has no suspicion
My mother loved adventure
My father commanded respect
When they died they left no instructions
Just a legacy to protect

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]

Death doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When everyone who loves me has died
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Nothing is left in my life I can control

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
I am disreputable,
I am now a fairy tale

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Always falling behind or there too late

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Now all I have left is to grow old and wait

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait
Wait
Wait

[BILBO]
Frodo faces an endless uphill climb

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Climb
Climb
Climb

[BILBO]
He has to save us all
He is so very small

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Small
Small

[BILBO]
The Enemy’s pace is relentless
He wastes no time

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Time
Time
Time

[BILBO]
Still Frodo answers the call.

The Ring doesn’t hesitate
It exhibits no restraint
It takes and it takes and it takes
And it will exploit any way
It eats you alive from inside
and it gnaws and it breaks
And if there’s a reason
It came to me when none could foresee, then damn it all —

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it…

Life doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners and the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall and we break
And we make our mistakes

And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When so many have died
Then I’m willin’ to—

[BILBO]
Wait for it…

Wait for it…

Your Hamilton/Hobbit crossover is my favorite thing in the world right now! I just want to make a request for a version of “Wait For It” as sung by Bilbo or “Satisfied” with Bilbo/Thorin or both. (I don’t know if you are taking requests but I figure it doesn’t hurt to ask!!!!)

Oh my goodness, Nonnie – Sure thing! I hope you like, this was a bit on the tricky side but I am pretty pleased with how it turned out!:)

[BILBO]
Writing out the story in the Red Book every day
I’m keeping the lamp lit while your light is away
He’s on the other side of twilight,
He tried to take back what was his,
But now the nights are growing darker,
and it is what it is.

Love doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep loving anyway
We laugh and we cry
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason beyond my pride
That I stayed by his side
Then I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

My grandfather was a Thain and a great tactician
But there are things of which the Shire has no suspicion
My mother loved adventure
My father commanded respect
When they died they left no instructions
Just a legacy to protect

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]

Death doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When everyone who loves me has died
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Nothing is left in my life I can control

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
I am disreputable,
I am now a fairy tale

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Always falling behind or there too late

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Now all I have left is to grow old and wait

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait
Wait
Wait

[BILBO]
Frodo faces an endless uphill climb

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Climb
Climb
Climb

[BILBO]
He has to save us all
He is so very small

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Small
Small
Small
Small

[BILBO]
The Enemy’s pace is relentless
He wastes no time

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Time
Time
Time

[BILBO]
Still Frodo answers the call.

The Ring doesn’t hesitate
It exhibits no restraint
It takes and it takes and it takes
And it will exploit any way
It eats you alive from inside
and it gnaws and it breaks
And if there’s a reason
It came to me when none could foresee, then damn it all —

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it…

Life doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners and the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall and we break
And we make our mistakes

And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When so many have died
Then I’m willin’ to—

[BILBO]
Wait for it…

Wait for it…

Courtesy of the Gimizh & co., Gimli and the remainder of the company send a package to Bilbo and the hobbits of the Fellowship. In it? A set of fake beards and mustaches for them, all in the correct colors, made by Dori, Dis, and even one made by Wee Thorin, since, “They don’t got no hair on their faces at all!” Merry and Pippin often wear theirs, especially when they finally *visit* Erebor. Bilbo and Frodo’s *might* make their across the sea with them.

Sam: “Well, look at me, Mister Frodo! Why, I could be as Stoorish as a Breelander!” It gets Frodo to smile. That means it’s worth its weight in gold, as far as Sam’s concerned. 

(Tiny little Elanor finds it one day. She looks HYSTERICALLY FUNNY in it.)

Merry & Pippin: *die of laughter, use them to prank each other and everybody else*

Frodo: sends a very polite ‘thank you’ letter… and never wears it.

Bilbo: secretly tries it on in the mirror when nobody else is watching, checks himself from all angles, preens and prances about a bit and chuckles and uses all the Dwarvish swear-words he remembers… and then grows quiet, letting the funny beard fall to his knees and sighing. 

Dear Dets, do you ever think about what Bilbo’s experience might have been if he’d actually reached the Lonely Mountain after his disappearance from his birthday party?

Oooooh.

It would have been hard for him. Not just the journey (he’s a VERY elderly hobbit, after all) but.

Looking at certain places, certain areas in the Mountain. Of course, many things would have been VASTLY different, all that time… but different enough not to prick and prod at those memories? I don’t know…

Still, he would have been delighted to see and spend time with his old friends, all together at last. 

There would have been some… very obvious vacancies. 

(Silence is sucked into those gaps around the table, sinking heavier into the pauses where another is expected to take up the tale, or to shout their indignation… but they’re not there. They’re not there, and there’s a gap, a breath, and the silence sinks into it a little deeper every time.)

Imagine, all of them spending time together, and then maybe one of the Dwarves mentions something, or perhaps Bilbo begins a particular story… only for the words to trip and stutter to a halt upon a particular name. Balin. Oin. Ori. Fili. Kili. 

Tho-

Are you all right, lad? You’ve gone quite pale.

You’re one to talk, your beard’s turned whiter than my hair. And I’m perfectly all right. Just a momentary catch in the throat.