Tag: hobbit4ham


https://determamfidd.tumblr.com/post/141948997788/audio_player_iframe/determamfidd/tumblr_o4uk8xxrnb1rb0mtv?audio_file=https%3A%2F%2Fa.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_o4uk8xxrnb1rb0mtvo1.mp3

I DID IT YESSSSSSSS

For the ongoing hobbit4ham shenanigans! This is a recorded version of ‘Wait For It’ as sung by Bilbo, with added accompaniment and chorus bc reasons.

(HEY @culturalrebel I WENT NUTS AGAIN)

(originally posted here, lyrics reproduced under the cut heeeeey)

[BILBO]
Writing out the story in the Red Book every day
I’m keeping the lamp lit while your light is away
He’s on the other side of twilight,
He tried to take back what was his,
But now the nights are growing darker,
and it is what it is.

Love doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep loving anyway
We laugh and we cry
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason beyond my pride
That I stayed by his side
Then I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

My grandfather was a Thain and a great tactician
But there are things of which the Shire has no suspicion
My mother loved adventure
My father commanded respect
When they died they left no instructions
Just a legacy to protect

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]

Death doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When everyone who loves me has died
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Nothing is left in my life I can control

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
I am disreputable,
I am now a fairy tale

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Always falling behind or there too late

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Now all I have left is to grow old and wait

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait
Wait
Wait

[BILBO]
Frodo faces an endless uphill climb

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Climb
Climb
Climb

[BILBO]
He has to save us all
He is so very small

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Small
Small

[BILBO]
The Enemy’s pace is relentless
He wastes no time

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Time
Time
Time

[BILBO]
Still Frodo answers the call.

The Ring doesn’t hesitate
It exhibits no restraint
It takes and it takes and it takes
And it will exploit any way
It eats you alive from inside
and it gnaws and it breaks
And if there’s a reason
It came to me when none could foresee, then damn it all —

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it…

Life doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners and the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall and we break
And we make our mistakes

And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When so many have died
Then I’m willin’ to—

[BILBO]
Wait for it…

Wait for it…

Your Hamilton/Hobbit crossover is my favorite thing in the world right now! I just want to make a request for a version of “Wait For It” as sung by Bilbo or “Satisfied” with Bilbo/Thorin or both. (I don’t know if you are taking requests but I figure it doesn’t hurt to ask!!!!)

Oh my goodness, Nonnie – Sure thing! I hope you like, this was a bit on the tricky side but I am pretty pleased with how it turned out!:)

[BILBO]
Writing out the story in the Red Book every day
I’m keeping the lamp lit while your light is away
He’s on the other side of twilight,
He tried to take back what was his,
But now the nights are growing darker,
and it is what it is.

Love doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep loving anyway
We laugh and we cry
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason beyond my pride
That I stayed by his side
Then I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

My grandfather was a Thain and a great tactician
But there are things of which the Shire has no suspicion
My mother loved adventure
My father commanded respect
When they died they left no instructions
Just a legacy to protect

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]

Death doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners
And the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall
And we break
And we make our mistakes
And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When everyone who loves me has died
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Nothing is left in my life I can control

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
I am disreputable,
I am now a fairy tale

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Always falling behind or there too late

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

[BILBO]
Now all I have left is to grow old and wait

[DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Wait
Wait
Wait

[BILBO]
Frodo faces an endless uphill climb

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
Climb
Climb
Climb

[BILBO]
He has to save us all
He is so very small

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Small
Small
Small
Small

[BILBO]
The Enemy’s pace is relentless
He wastes no time

[ DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY ]
Time
Time
Time

[BILBO]
Still Frodo answers the call.

The Ring doesn’t hesitate
It exhibits no restraint
It takes and it takes and it takes
And it will exploit any way
It eats you alive from inside
and it gnaws and it breaks
And if there’s a reason
It came to me when none could foresee, then damn it all —

[BILBO/DEAD DWARF PEANUT GALLERY]
I’m willing to wait for it
I’m willing to wait for it…

Life doesn’t discriminate
Between the sinners and the saints
It takes and it takes and it takes
And we keep living anyway
We rise and we fall and we break
And we make our mistakes

And if there’s a reason I’m still alive
When so many have died
Then I’m willin’ to—

[BILBO]
Wait for it…

Wait for it…

More Hobbit4Ham

Just thought I’d add this;

Thranduil:

I signed a treaty with a king whose head is in basket. 

Do you want me to take it out and ask it?

“Should I help the dwarves King Thror’s head?”

“Uhh do what you want, I’m super dead!”

Thank you so much for posting my earlier submission! You guys are so talented and I love this crossover 🙂

MORE HOBBIT4HAM FROM THE WONDROUS CULTURALREBEL!

[DIS]

Oooh! I do, I do, I do, I

Doooo.  Hey!

Ooooh! I do, I do, I do, I dooo!

Nidoy, you got me

[DIS/DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless!

Look into your eyes, and the sky’s the limit I’m helpless!

Down for the count, and I’m drownin’ in ‘em!

[DIS]

I have never been the type to try and grab the spotlight.

We were at a party, kinsmen hearty on a hot night.

Laughing at Frerin while he’s dashing ‘round the room

Then you walked in and my heart went boom.

Tryin’ to catch your eye from the side of the ballroom

Everybody’s dancing and the band’s top volume.

Stomp to the rhythm as we wine and dine!

Grabbed my brother, said “No other.

This one’s mine!”

[DWARROWDAMS]

Oooh!

[DIS]

My brother makes his way across the room to you.

And I got nervous, thinking “What’s he gonna do?”

He grabs you by the arm, I’m thinkin’ you’re through!

Then you look back to me and suddenly I’m

[DIS/DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless!

[DIS]

Ooh, look at the eyes!-

[DWARROWDAMS]

Look into your eyes and the sky’s the limit, I’m-

[DIS/DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless!

Down for the count and I’m drownin’ in them!

[DIS]

I’m so into you!

I am so into you!

[DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless! (I know that I’m)

Down for the count and I’m drowning in them!

[VILI]

Where are you taking me?

[THORIN]

I’m about to change your life.

[VILI]

Then by all means, lead the way.

[DIS]

Dis, daughter of Thrain.  Pleasure to meet you.

[VILI]

Lord Thrain?

[THORIN]

My sister.

[DIS]

Thank you for all your service.

[VILI]

If it takes fighting for the Delf for us to meet, it will have been worth it.

[THORIN]

…I’ll leave you to it.

[DIS]

One week later, I’m writing a letter nightly.

Now my life gets better every letter that you write me.

Laughing at my brother ‘cos he’s working on his glarin’.

[THORIN]

I’m just saying, if he hurts you, Frerin and I’ll shear him.

[DIS]

Ha!

Two weeks later, in the living room stressin’

My father stone-faced while you’re asking for his blessing

I’m dying inside as you wine and dine,

And I’m trying not to cry, cos there’s nothing that your mind can’t do.

My father makes his way across the room to you.

I panic for a second, thinking ‘We’re through!’

But then he shakes your hand and says ‘Be true.’

And you turn back to me, smiling and I’m

[DIS/DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless!

Look into your eyes and the sky’s the limit, I’m

Helpless! (Whoo!)

Down for the count and I’m drowning in them!

Helpless! (He’s mine! That Dwarf is miiine!)

Helpless!

Down for the count and I’m drowning in them!

[VILI]

M’lady, I don’t have a penny to my name.

An acre of land, a troop to command, a dollop of fame,

All I have’s my honour, a tolerance for pain.

A couple of years of crafting and my top-notch brain.

Insane! Your family brings out a different side of me.

Frerin confides in me, and Thorin tried to take a bite of me

No stress! My love for you is never in doubt!

We’ll get a place in Ered Luin and we’ll figure it out.

I’ve been living without a family since I was a wean,

My father left, my mother died, all those years so lean.

But I’ll never forget my mother’s face, that was real.

And ‘long as I’m alive, m’jewel, swear to Mahal

You’ll never feel so-

[DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless!

[DIS]

I do, I do, I do, I do!

[VILI]

Ghivasha…

[DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless!

[DIS]

I do, I do, I do, I do!

[VILI]

I’ve never felt so-

[DIS]

Yeah! Down for the count and I’m drowning in them!

[VILI]

My life is looking fine ‘cos my Dis is in it.

[DIS]

I look into your eyes and the sky’s the limit, I’m-

[DIS/DWARROWDAMS]

Helpless! Down for the count and I’m drowning in them!

[DWARROWDAMS]

A new beginning in a new land.

A new beginning in a new land.

A new beginning in a new laaaaand….

[DIS]

Helpless…

Okay but Dis singing ‘Helpless’ and it’s about the first time she ever met Vili

OOOH YES YES THAT YES (based on my little Fris ficlet!)

[DIS]
I have never been the type to use my name to get ahead
Went out to the marketplace to buy my family some bread
Bored out of my skull and trying not to feel the gloom
Then you spoke up and my heart went “Boom!”
Tryin’ not to laugh as you’re joking and styling
Everybody’s frowning and I know I’m smiling

[DIS AND WOMEN]
Oh, he’s a nobody but oh he’s fine

[DIS]
Deep inside, there’s a whisper,
“Yo, this
One’s mine.”

You realise just who it is you’re talking to,
And I got nervous, thinking “What’s he gonna do?”
You spot my mother’s cloak, I’m thinkin’ “I’m through”

Then you smile up at me and

suddenly I’m
Helpless!

Ham4Hobbit

Hey there! I love you guy’s Hobbit and Hamilton crossover so much I just thought I’d throw these lyrics into the mix 🙂

King Georduil: Bilbo Baggins? I know him. That can’t be. Thats that little guy who stole from me

– – –

Burrbo: Smaug breathes fire at Oakenshield. Calls him “Dwarrow Bastard” in his taunts. Oakenshield offers his response;

Hamilthorin: SIT DOWN SMAUG YOU FAT MOTHERF#$@%R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bofur: Oakenshield’s out of control

– – – –

Hamilthorin: Lord show me how to say no to this. I don’t know how to say no to this. But the situations helpless and this gold is saying “Mahal yes!“ 

BURRBO OH MY ACTUAL GOD AHAHAHAHA these are wonderful!!! Thank you, thank you SO MUCH, yes yes all the hobbity hamilton mashups, this is fantastic, thank you!! @culturalrebel LOOK!

HOBBIT4HAM BY CULTURALREBEL SOME MORE (because why cry over one epic sad story when you can cry over two)

[BILBO]

How does an exiled, orphaned son of a Longbeard and

A Durin, dropped in the middle of

Of the enduring hills west of the Shire, by providence

Impoverished, in squalor?

Grow up to be a hero and a brawler?

[FILI]

The proud prince of our First Father, without a bother

Got a lot farther by working a lot harder

By being a lot smarter

By being a self-starter

And by forty, they placed him in charge of the trading charter.

[DAIN]

And every day while goods were being carted and sold away

Across the river, the kingdom’s riches stretched farther.

Inside, each Dwarf had something to be proud of

And no-one had to beg, steal, borrow or barter.

[BALIN]

Then dragonfire came, and devastation reigned.

Our prince saw our future burn-burnin’ down in flames.

Put a sword in his hand, vengeance flowing through his brain.

And he made his fury plain, a testament to his pain.

[BILBO]

Well, the word got around, Gandalf said

“This Dwarf is insane, man!”

Offered him protection while he searched through the Lone-lands.

“Bring the resurrection of the land from whence you came.

And the world’s gonna know your name!”

What’s your name, man?

[THORIN]

Thorin Thrainul Oakenshield.

My name is Thorin Thrainul Oakenshield.

I have a kingdom that I must rebuild.

So just you wait, just you wait…

[DIS]

After eight years, Grandfather split,

A fire lit, reclaim the Pit

A year later, sees Thorin and our brother takin’ hits

Half-dead! Covered in Orc sick, the blood thick.

[ENSEMBLE]

And Thorin got better, but Frerin went quick.

[DWALIN]

Moved in with a cousin, who told him his plan was suicide!

Left with nothing but ruined pride, something new inside

A voice saying-

[ALL]

Thorin, you gotta fight for what’s yours!

[DWALIN]

He started readin’, believin’ he would settle all his scores.

[BILBO]

There would’ve been nothing left to do for someone lest astute

He would’ve been dead or destitute

Without a cent of restitution

Started working! Forging everything he could get paid for!

Trading metal, weapons, hammers, all the things he can’t afford!

Searching for every Dwarf that he could get his hands on!

Prophecies foretold, see him now as he stands on

The bow of a ship heading for his rightful home!

The King of carven stone shall come into his own!

[ALL]

The King of carven stone shall come into his own!

[THORIN]

Just you wait.

[ALL]

The King of carven stone shall come into his own!

[THORIN]

Just you wait.

[ALL]

The King of carven stone shall come into his own!

King Thorin!

[THORIN]

Just you waiiiit!

[ALL]

Thorin Thrainul Oakenshield!

We are waiting in the wings for you!

You could never back down,

You never learned to take your tiiiime!

Oh, Thorin Thrainul Oakenshield!

All of Erebor sings for you!

Will they know what you overcame?

Will they know you rewrote the game?

The world will never be the same, ohhh!

[BILBO]

The ship has left the riverside,

See if you can spot him!

Durin’s Day upon him now,

He must climb from the bottom!

His foes tried to wreck his rep

But we will not forget him!

[COMPANY/THRANDUIL/BARD]

We…fought with him.

[FILI AND KILI]

Us, we died for him.

[DAIN]

Me, I trusted him.

[BILBO/DIS]

Me, I loved him.

[AZOG]

And me? I’m the Pale Orc that stabbed him!

[ENSEMBLE]

I have a kingdom that I must rebuild!

So just you waiiit!

[BILBO]

What’s your name, man?

[THORIN/ENSEMBLE]

Thorin Thrainul Oakenshield!

I sang along with this one in my head EVERY FREAKIN WORD omfffffg

culturalrebel strikes again: Hobbit4Ham AMAZINGNESS AHOY

[ENSEMBLE]

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, niiiine!

[THORIN]

There are ten things you need to know.

[ENSEMBLE]

Number one!

[THORIN]

We broke across the barriers at dawn.

My kin rode out with me, Dwalin served as my

[ALL]

Number two!

[THORIN]

Azog was there with his crew.

His son Bolg, and some Warg-Scouts that he knew

[ENSEMBLE]

Number three!

[THORIN]

I watched as he examined the terrain.

I don’t want to tell you what was happening in his brain.

The end of my line, this beast has pursued!

[ALL]

The end of his blade, you must elude!

Number four!

[THORIN]

Azog hid, maintained his position

We went up the hills, his death our mission

This is an Orc with a general’s ability

Even with his kind, he’s regarded with infamy.

[ENSEMBLE]

Five!

[THORIN]

Our allies were running out of time

So I passed the same spot where Fili died

And that’s why-

[ENSEMBLE]

Six!

[THORIN]

I examined my sword with such rigour

Fire in my soul and vengeance tasting bitter.

[ENSEMBLE]

Seven!

[THORIN]

Confession time? Here’s what I got:

My kinsmen and the burglar, in my hate I forgot.

[ENSEMBLE]

Eight!

[THORIN]

My last chance, don’t negotiate.

Kill or be killed, see if hell or Mahal’s Halls await.

They won’t say this part when this tale’s told

But here it is: I let my pride and fury run cold.

Why? So I could take deadly aim.

It’s him or me, the world will never be the same!

I had only one thought before the slaughter:

This Orc will not take the last son of Thrain’s daughter.

[ENSEMBLE]

Number nine!

[THORIN]

Look him in the eye, aim no higher!

Summon all the courage you require!

Then count!

[ENSEMBLE]

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight nine!

Number ten paces, fire!

Me: *curled on the floor, alshgdshdjagfajhgajha NOOOOOO AUGH THIS IS AMAZING*