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I suppose that this was in response to this – you’re superly duper kind, Nonnie. I know I am improving at some stuff, but I find fault with my own writing ALL the time. I get tremendously nervous ALL the time. It’s why I’m such an obsessive editor. You should see me before I post a chapter – I am generally a shaking wreck. No word of a lie.
It’s. Not necessarily a bad thing, though? I mean, knowing that I’m never ever going to be the best at whatever that I can be, that there’s always room to grow and improve, is actually a bit heartening for me. I feel the same way about my singing tbh. I like that there is still stuff to work on, all the time. That perhaps my pacing, or character voice, or imagery – or my tone colour, my placement, my breath control – all of that stuff, I can always get better at it. The nerves are that part of me that is a perfectionist, that is all-or-nothing, and that bit of me wants to give up if it’s not perfectly perfect.
So I get my nerves and I get frantic and then I squash ‘em and post my thing, or sing my song, trembling the whole damned time. And it might not be the most profoundly incredible thing ever written or the best song ever sung – but it is as good as I can do in that moment. Next moment might be even better. Unless I actually put it out there, I won’t ever find out, though.
And it appears that, thanks to US copyright extension laws, between the interests of Warner Bros, the Tolkien Estate and New Line, Tolkien’s works aren’t ever going to hit public domain. Which sucks a bit.
(But I’m totally happy for you to make your own copy of Sansukh, for your own use, if you so wish, Nonnie!)

