Tag: melian

Still on the subject of mandos, I always wondered how namo dealt with all the elves sharing one space (esp all the noldorin + teleri ect) some of the fights that break out must be legendary

(I don’t envy Namo. Not one bit.)

“You take that back!!”

“Make me!”

“I’ll make you eat your teeth in a minute…”

“Oh, like you could fight your way out of a wine-jug!”

“RIGHT, THAT’S IT-”

“Cowardy cowardy custard, sat eating cake behind Melian’s skirts while everybody else did all the fighting…!”

“Shut up, shut your face! Who was it who built everything, eh? All you lot did was stomp on over, take everything that wasn’t yours, and trash the lot!”

“HOW DARE – well, at least we didn’t try bribery, extortion and impossible murder-quests as bride-prices…”

“YOU talk of murder-quests, HA, that’s bloody rich!”

“And just what’s that supposed to mean?”

“One word: Ships.”

“Oh fuck you!”

“FUCK YOU MORE WITH A SILMARIL ON TOP.”

(Namo is considering some sort of Elven Time-Out room.)

your fave is problematic: thingol

greenekangaroo:

songsoftheirdeeds:

  • ditches his bros for his gf without warning anyone
  • his people hunted Dwarves for sport and eventually were like ‘whoopsie they’re sentient’ 
  • banned Quenya (languages don’t kinslay people; people kinslay people)
  • keeps awful cursed swords in his armory what
  • playing against him in basketball is hopelessly unfair
  • started yelling racial insults at a bunch of armed angry people in a property dispute with him
  • why did he even want a silmaril though

All of this is 100% truuueee.

I mean I’m still on Thingol’s side when it comes to the Feanorians but that’s more because they were clearly colonizing with intent to rule and that was soommme bullshit. 

But Thingol. 

Why you gotta get racist during property disputes? 

Like. 

You might have lived. Maybe.