calling women “crazy” because they don’t do as they are told/what you expect them to do is pure woman-hatred.
news flash! women are PEOPLE. with their own unique personalities and will.
fuck kermit and his sorry green ass.
men ain’t shit.
no matter the species.
i can’t tell if this is serious or not
miss piggy was physically, emotionally, sexually and verbally abusive towards him for decades
are people really trying to shift all the blame onto kermit for finally breaking up with her
also they’re fucking fictional puppets in a probably-temporary breakup manufactured to stir up interest in the new series, none of this is actually real
I think you mean “Dee Derscerse”
TEDEE IN DEE DERSCERSE
A TUMBLR HINGA DURGEN MISSU PIGGY IN DE BREEKIP WIT DE KERMIE
predictions for the next mcu phase: valkyrie will cry drunk on a kitchen floor at least once because she wants to hang out with bruce and the hulk at the same time
Valkyrie, her mighty unbeatable arms wrapped around the hulk whom she has pulled forcibly into her lap: I shouldn’t have gotten drunk!! I can’t protect him!!!
Bruce, who is no longer the Hulk and also naked and covered in debris: what. what happened
Thorin: -broods in the corner with a glass of whiskey -gives everyone the stink eye -secretly loves this P!nk song but would never say so
Fili: -dances like your dad at a barbeque -has cheetos dust in his beard -might, actually will, hurt himself or someone else
Kili: -was way too drunk before the party even began -drinking a margarita made of melted jolly ranchers, ice, and way too much vodka -dances like a frat bro without the sleaze
Dwalin: -hides out in the corner with Thorin and a flask he brought from home -must rein in the Durin Bros when they get to rowdy -hates his life
Bofur: -the DJ with the way too random music -falls down the stairs as a party trick -wears a red cup as a hat
Bombur: -becomes Balin’s nemesis after devouring all the hors d’oeuvres -broke the trampoline which was explicitly off-limits -master of beer pong
Bifur: -retreats to the bathroom -leaves early -was he even there?
Dori: -staying sober with Balin -trying to clean up the ever growing mess -hass 911 on standby
Nori: -may have stolen all the silverware…and the plastic forks too -invited those guys no one knows and who are freaking everyone out -makes everyone figure out the “password” to get in
Ori: -can’t handle his liquor -is the partygoer who will inevitably be hurt by Fili -brought a colouring book because he misinterpreted the invitation
Oin: -will fight someone or a whole bunch of someones -judges you by your drink -passes out in the backyard
Gloin: -won’t stop fixing things around the house -yet still drinking without pause -made friends with dog
Gimli: the fuck should I make for Legolas as a courting gift
Thorin, probably:
PERFECT!
When you try to break the siege and save Dale, but the Orc Army is led by Dagalur…
DETS GODDAMNIT I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU JUST MADE ME LAUGH ABOUT THAT
Readers: please no more angst we can’t take it
Dets:
ACCURATE AF BWAAAHAHAHAHA
okay okay i’m gonna stop… after these announcements…
I think if I reblog this post anymore I might break my dash. BUT I CAN’T NOT REBLOG THESE ADDITIONS. DETS THAT LAST ONE HAD ME ROLLING ON THE FLOOR GODDAMN YOU THAT SONG IS SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME DEPRESSED NOT THINK OF THE DOS EQUIS GUY
Aw Yiss 